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Here is a selection of funny Chinese Proverbs
Passionate kiss like spider's web, soon lead to undoing of fly.
Virginity like bubble, one prick all gone.
Man who run in front of car get tired.
Man who run behind car get exhausted.
Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.
Foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ.
Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.
Man with one chopstick go hungry.
Man who scratches ass should not bite fingernails.
Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.
Panties not best thing on earth but next to best thing on earth.
War doesn't determine who is right, war determines who is left.
Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse.
It take many nails to build crib but one screw to fill it.
Man who drive like hell bound to get there.
Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.
Man who lives in glass house should change clothes in basement.
Man who fishes in other man's well often catches crabs.
Man who farts in church sits in own pew.
Man who wants pretty nurse, must be patient.
Better to be pissed off than pissed on.
Boy who go to sleep with hard problem wake up with solution in hand.
Girl who sit on jockeys lap get hot tip.
Girl who sits on Judge's lap get honorable discharge.
Lady who go camping must beware of evil intent.

Man who keep feet firmly on ground have trouble putting on pants.
Man who leap off cliff jump to conclusion.
Man who smoke pot choke on handle.
Man with tight trousers is pressing his luck.
Man who loves and loses, have not right lawyer.
Man who pushes piano down mine shaft get A flat miner.
Television never replace old reliable key hole.
Laziest man in world who marry widow with six children.
Man who put head on railroad track get splitting headache.
Girl who do back spring on bedspring have offspring next spring.
Woman who cooks carrots and peas in same pot is unsanitary.
Crowded elevator smells different to midget.
Man who stutters has a lot to say.
It is good for girl to meet boy in park, but better for boy to park meat in girl.
Man who drop watch in toilet have shitty time.
Learn to masturbate- It'll come in handy.
Man who sneezes without hanky takes matters into his own hands.
He who eats too many prunes, sits on potty many moons
Man who make love to girl on hill...he not on level.